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As a parent, you always want the very best in life for your child. By spending the time and energy to support your child to develop their resilience, you are setting them up with the best chances of success in life.
Resilient children tend to be better at communicating with others and have improved problem-solving skills. Their heightened motivation levels contribute to a robust interest in learning, thereby enhancing their school performance and facilitating the achievement of their set goals. High levels of resilience also support improving mood and outlook on life. In turn, this improves children's hope about the future, they engage more meaningfully in activities, and they have solid relationships with one or more adults.
Additionally, children with high levels of resilience normally are found to have the following characteristics:
Ability to show empathy with others;
Greater social skills;
Independence;
Ability to concentrate on school work;
Sense of humour; and
High self-concept, self-esteem, and self-confidence.
The Benevolent Society has undertaken extensive research on children’s resilience, identifying five outcomes that enhanced resilience can bolster. The below outlines a guide of key outcomes, and the evidence-informed actions and support you can provide as a parent to support achieving this for your child.
Outcome 1 – Secure and stable relationships
Stable, predictable, and reliable relationships lead to improved behaviours and emotional wellbeing in children.
Positive parent-child relationships are critical to the wellbeing of children.
Unconditional love, warmth, acceptance, praise, and positive attention all help improve a child’s feeling of self-worth.
Establishing family routines, including increased quality time spent listening, talking, and playing together, as well as recognising teachable moments and offering descriptive praise.
Outcome 2 – Increased feeling of safety
Both physical safety as well as emotional safety are core to resilience in children.
Physical safety is supported through the environment in which they are living, and the physical care, hygiene, and nutrition to support their health and growth.
Emotional safety can be supported through positive relationships with caregivers, family, and friends.
Consider positive discipline strategies to reduce unwanted behaviours and emphasise the development of a healthy relationship with your child and clear expectations around behaviour.
Outcome 3 – Increased self-efficacy
A child’s perception of their competence develops over time through positive life experiences and feedback from important adults in their lives (e.g. parents, caregivers, coaches, teachers, etc).
Children should be consistently and affirmatively reminded that they possess the abilities and skills to navigate challenging situations. This reinforces their motivation to exert more effort and persevere in the face of obstacles.
Recognise and encourage both effort and persistence. Support achievable, yet aspirational, goal setting for success.
Support the development of a healthy inner voice for your child through challenging negative thinking and reinforcing their positive self-belief.
Outcome 4 – Improved empathy
Empathy has three main components; a sense of self-awareness including the ability to distinguish between the feelings of others and self, understanding another person’s perspective, and being able to self-regulate emotional responses.
Children who develop empathy at a younger age are better equipped to treat others with compassion and are more likely to adjust easily at school.
With each year of a child’s life, they experience a widening range of emotions through new experiences (both personal experiences and witnessed experiences).
Support this expanded understanding of emotions through teachable moments, modelling empathy, and supporting the naming of emotions with your child.
Outcome 5 – Increased coping skills and self-regulation
Research has consistently shown that the ability to regulate emotional responses to challenging experiences and solve interpersonal problems is linked with social competence, academic performance, and positive experiences at home and school.
In addition to the development of coping skills, it is important to develop problem-solving skills to support your child’s ability to listen and think calmly, consider creative options, respect other’s opinions and needs, negotiate and work towards compromises, and persist until they find a solution (refer chapter 1 for coping skills information and suggestions).
As cognitive abilities and the size of the child’s challenges grow and evolve, so should your approach to teaching problem-solving skills.
Teach your child how to break down problems, support them to work it out themselves, and encourage them to utilise tools to support the process (such as writing out the problem, brainstorming on paper, etc).
Conclusion
These outcomes are important for your child’s development of resilience. The research by the Benevolent Society clearly demonstrates that enhancing resilience in children leads to a multitude of positive outcomes.
Resilience acts as a buffer against adversity, empowering children to navigate challenges more effectively. When resilience is cultivated, children not only develop stronger emotional regulation and coping mechanisms but also show improved social connections, academic performance, and mental health.
These gains extend into adulthood, fostering individuals who are better equipped to handle life’s complexities. Prioritising resilience-building initiatives is therefore a key factor in ensuring long-term success and wellbeing for children.
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